Better-Than-Sex (BTS)

I had an acquaintance who used to make a cake he called the BTS chocolate cake. He made up the recipe and always included two family-sized blocks of Cadbury Dairy Milk chocolate and a packet of instant chocolate pudding mix. He never, ever told anyone the full list of ingredients. He liked to keep an air of mystery about his BTS cake. He was a Leo in the classic sense who craved the centre of attention, so much so that he trained himself to talk without needing to stop for a breath, like a digerido player who can create a constant sound by breathing in and out simultaneously. This guy had an enormous repertoire of jokes and he could recite them one after the other without drawing a breath and without recognising that we were all trying to get a word in edge-wise let alone trying to begin a conversation. The worst such occasion was when six of us were on a nine-day sailing holiday with him on a 40 foot cruiser and in the evenings cramped in the small space of the dining room without escape. By day two I seriously considered walking the plank. He also used to carry a rubber chicken with him where ever he went and he had a collection of “funny” hats that he put on in order to stand out. One had hands on the side of it that clapped when he pulled the strings below his chin.

Anyway, I actually wanted to talk about this concept of something being better than sex. Surely it is all relative. I mean for something to be better than sex, wouldn’t you have to be in a frame of mind or state of hormonal flux where you actually weren’t in the mood for sex for it to be true?

Today I had a better-than-sex experience.

This morning I felt exhausted and slightly down. My energy levels were depleted from the demands of teaching a long day yesterday with new groups of students and a body clock that has not completely adjusted to eastern standard time in Australia. Not only this, I was experiencing a feeling of anxiety due to unmet expectations. In short, this morning I was a waste-of-space. And in this state, my long list of things I should have been doing seemed insurmountable. Finally I decided that if I were unable to think straight enough to do useful work or study, I would at least go to the market and restock the house with fresh fruit and veg. I made this decision at 1pm – a late but good decision.

At the market I bumped into a friend and colleague whilst stacking my trolley in the vegie stall. We chatted for the good part of half an hour, shifting slightly whenever someone else wanted to reach the peas or sprouts. Afterwards I still felt low in energy but the friendly exchange jolted me out of myself enough to bring on an urge to pop over to Borders Bookshop. There I picked up our latest bookclub book: ‘The Lollipop Shoes’ by Joanne Harris (author of Chocolate, which I enjoyed years ago).

With over twenty minutes to kill before school pickup, I decided to grab a caffe latte and read the first few pages of this book. It engaged me immediately. The coffee was excellent. I sat in a comfy lounge chair in a snug little cafe and relished those pages! Suddenly, a sense of completeness radiated through me and I experienced an elevation of spirits. Finding a good book was exactly what I needed – better than sex!